It's All About the Chocolate

Yes, I know; I'm two days late to do an official post about Valentine's Day. But I was doing speech things all day Saturday and have today off, so I'm wishing you all a belated Hallmark Day (so named by my best friend, who says the holiday wouldn't exist if Hallmark didn't make money from the cards).
So to start, let's open a box of chocolates.

AREN'T THEY ADORABLE?!?!?!?! (The answer you're looking for is yes.) I got sick of seeing that stupid Forrest Gump quote every third image in Google, so I pasted this one in just because. But seriously:

Chocolate

and Chocolate

and CHOCOLATE

and...oh, dear; chocolate box is empty. Super sad face

Okay, so I know I'm being ridiculous. But aside from the fact that chocolate makes me happy, I actually do have a purpose in bringing this up. Honest.
How many of you received a chocolate heart for Valentine's Day? Something like the one below:

I did not. Really that's alright with me; I definitely don't need anyone buying me sugar. How many of you received said chocolates from someone other than your husband/fiancee/significant-other? How many of you bought YOURSELF chocolate for Valentine's Day?
My friends and I used to refer to Valentine's Day as "Singles' Awareness Day". We contemplated buying each other flowers but it was too expensive. We did, however, buy each other little treats, chocolate and other things, just because.
Valentine Chocolate is on sale right now. I have it on pretty good authority-aka, my mother-that some of it is fairly cheap. Buy yourself some chocolate. Buy your girlfriends some chocolate. Know a woman who is alone on Valentine's Day-divorced, or widowed, or maybe has a husband overseas? Do something for her. I promise you it can make someone's day. If you do something for someone, leave me a comment to tell me about it. Valentine's Day may be commercialised to focus on a person's significant other, but it doesn't have to be. So maybe Valentine'd Day isn't all about the chocolate; it's about love. Loving our friends is important too, and we all need that little pick-me-up from time to time. That's why God gave us friends; "as iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend" (Proverbs 27:17, NIV). And when someone buys you chocolate, don't feel bad about eating the entire box. :)

~Sheridan

PS Anytime one of you wants to buy me chocolate, you're more than welcome. ;)

Some Days are Not Like Others

Do you every feel like you just need to pray? Without knowing why, without any measure of understanding what's going on? Just that feeling, like you're going to need God to be especially close to you? I've felt like that lately. I get this sometimes, almost like I know something is going to happen. I felt it just before the terrorist attack on  the Charlie Hebdo magazine in Paris. I've been feeling it for a while, this sort of feeling that something is going to be happening in my life, good or bad, that is going to test my faith. Something I'm going to need to be prepared for.
I've been having a lot of discussions with a friend lately, and one thing she's brought up is the point that life's not fair. Specifically, how unfair it is that one person can work their whole lives trying to accomplish something, and another person comes along and gets it on the first go. She said it felt unjustified, like the second person didn't earn it and therefore didn't deserve it.
Hardships are designed to make us question. Question others, question ourselves. Question God. Think about Job; the entire point of the suffering the Devil inflicted upon him was to make him reject his faith in God.
The difference lies in what my youth pastor (aka my dad) describes as "head knowledge" versus "heart knowledge". The first thing I think of in this Jeremiah 29:11

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord;

'plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future.'" NIV

I could have recited this verse when I was eight years old. But it wouldn't have meant anything. The verse itself is head knowledge. Logically, when something happens we should not be concerned because God says He has everything under control. But consider what other parts of the Bible say.

"I have hidden your word in my HEART,

that I might not sin against you."

-Psalm 119:11 NIV

This is where heart knowledge comes in. A few years ago, I found myself really stuck in a rut, unable to motivate myself to do anything. I still end up there on a semi-regular basis, and I've come to terms with it as a psychological routine that I'm just going to have to deal with, but the first time I just couldn't seem to get out. You've all had those days I'm sure when your friends tell you "you're beautiful" and you really want to believe it, but you can't convince your heart that it's the truth. That's the difference, the tell-all between head knowledge and heart knowledge. Bible verses are head knowledge. Faith in what they mean to you is heart knowledge.
Some days, I really wish I could see the future. I wish I could even get a glimpse into God's plan for me. Unfortunately, that hasn't happened yet, but when I get feelings like this I really try not to ignore them. These feelings, for me, are a conviction. A reminder that I should be super-close with God ALL of the time, not just when I feel like something's going to happen. The friend I mentioned earlier? I gave her advice to comfort her dilemma, and maybe I should follow it myself. I told her that sometimes God does things, things we don't feel we deserve, because He's trying to tell us something. Maybe that message right now is a sort of reminder that without God, I am nothing. Without God, I have no reason to exist. Without God, I should be afraid of what's going to happen.
If you feel God has put it on you, I would ask you to pray for me. I don't know what's going to happen in my life over the next few weeks but my month-long blogging break is evidence of how stressed and busy I am. And, as always, I am happy to pray for you if you would like me to. Actually, I'm praying for all of you whether I know who you are or not, but if there is something specific I would love to lift that up. Feel free to comment, and I hope you all have a wonderful day.

~Sheridan

And We Think Our Christmas Presents are Cool

Hi there! It's getting closer to Christmas, which for me means a fire going constantly, shiny things everywhere I look, a house that smells unendingly of caramel, and the constant knowledge that "the snow glows white on the mountain tonight" all night, every night; in fact, it's snowing now. :) It also means I spend way too much time digging for the right change so I can, you know, pay for the Christmas presents I'm buying my three siblings and my parents, and waaaaay too much time wondering frantically if they'll like it. Pride point: I can get some pretty cool Christmas presents. Every once in a while, I'll pick something out and I just know it's what my sister never knew she always wanted. I have a couple of those this year; I'm just waiting for Thursday to confirm my suspicion.
Christmastime is all about gifts. I know in church, we always focus a lot on God's "ultimate" gift-Jesus. Not going to lie, he really is the gift none of us knew we all so desperately needed. But in this post, I actually want to focus on another gift, one that is indescribably precious, that only God could have ever thought of and created:

you.

Yes, you. Whether you believe me when I say it or not, you are a gift. Your unique and individual beauty is a gift. We are all immeasurably precious to God, all indescribably beautiful in his eyes. He has designed you exactly the way he wanted you, and he gave you your beauty as a gift, as a measure of how much he loves you.

We as humans don't do that. Instead of giving beauty we give beauty products. Instead of giving life we give suggestions on how to make life better. But the more I've thought about it, the more I've realised that no matter how shiny they are it isn't the presents that make Christmas beautiful; it's the look on my sister's face when she pulls the wrapping off and is excited not even because of what's inside but just at the thought that I got her something. It's my family sitting together at a table and eating the best caramel-cinnamon roles ever to exist and not so much enjoying our food, but each other's company. It's knowing that God gave us his Son so that we would have a chance to experience this kind of joy.

Have you ever watched little kids on Christmas morning? As I've seen it, they'll respond to Christmas in one of two ways. Either they think Santa brings everyone presents and their face lights up when they see what "Santa" brought them, or they've helped choose presents for mom and dad and maybe siblings too, and they are full of uncontainable anticipation because they want their mom to see what they've gotten her and they’re so excited to see her smile and be happy. This is the beauty of gifts, to experience a kind of gratitude and elation at knowing someone has cared enough about us to give us something special, and at being able to give something back to them.
Why should beauty be any different? Every day when you look in the mirror, you are experiencing the gift God has chosen specifically for you because He loves you. Do you feel that elation? Or do you feel dissatisfied, feel like you have to find your concealer and your mascara and you have to repaint your face into what you think it ought to be? Perhaps even more importantly, do you allow others to share in it? Will you share with them your smile, your voice, the time you would otherwise have spent in front of the mirror? Will you share with them your inner beauty: your compassion, your kindness, your passions, you joys? Beauty is a gift. Do you treat it as one?
I know I don't, more often than I really care to admit. Even on the occasions when I wear make-up, I never feel like it's "right", like I measure up. People offer me compliments and I brush them aside. I actively avoid people some days because I'm too wrapped up in my selfish musings about my appearance to give them the only thing they've ever asked of me: time. A person to talk to, a shoulder to cry on. Someone to give them a hug and stroke their hair and offer what some of them have never truly received--love. Every single one of us can give that whether or not your eyeliner is magazine-worthy, whether or not you feel like you look halfway-decent. Sometimes, I think the biggest thing that keeps us from being beautiful is the time spent trying to make ourselves pretty. Never once did God use "pretty" to describe a person in the Bible.

“You are altogether beautiful, my darling, 

and there is no blemish in you."

                                                       -Song of Solomon 4:7 NASB

Not "you look pretty today". "You are altogether beautiful". The New Living Translation says "You are altogether beautiful, my darling, beautiful in every way". As you're wrapping presents, maybe finishing up your Christmas shopping, think about this. And when you're giving and receiving presents on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day or whatever your family tradition is, remember that you have a gift no one can measure. Beauty is a gift. Will you treat it as one?

~Sheridan

#justdontask

Drama people are weird. Any of you who have ever met one ought to know. I left Thursday morning for Colorado's Thespian Conference, which basically means three days of hanging out with some of the weirdest people I know. Between then and now, here's what went down.

• My choir teacher said she really can't picture me in black leather. 
• I apparently can't count. Turns out eight comes after seven. 
• I got lost trying to find the bathroom I'd walked right past three times. 
• One of my best friends tried to get herself run over in the Target parking lot because she was picking up a penny. 
• I tried to get myself run over yelling at her for trying to get herself run over. 
• Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side in a car crash? Don't worry; he's alright now. (If you don't get this, try reading it out loud.) 
• I learned to beat people up. 
• The aforementioned friend tried to convince me to go to the thirteenth floor of our hotel at midnight tonight. Something about defying her triskaidekaphobia. 
• My other friends were traumatised by a greaser. 
• I wrote the first and last scene of a play in under ten minutes. 
• I turned around and yelled at a girl I don't even know for getting a song stuck in my head. She then proceeded to compliment my VeggieTales backpack. 
• I skipped through the streets singing "Under the Sea" with my drama buddies. 
• I'm sitting in a Mexican restaurant typing a post and watching my friends "salsa dance".

My friend Savannah, doing the "salsa dance"

• I was just asked if I wanted sugar with my chips. 
• The girl sitting next to me (another friend) turned up her hat. I told her it was the most attractive look I'd seen all day and her face made me laugh. Turns out, Chile rellano doesn't go well down the windpipe. 
• I tried to salute my drama teacher and hit myself in the eye. 

• Got up at 6:45 to work out. Any day where I burn 200 calories before breakfast has to have something good in it.
• Swing dancing is the bomb.
• I have skills. Try this: overloaded Subway sandwich in one hand, cup in the other, having a texting conversation and walking down a crowded street.
• CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!!
• Just watched a girl do a cross-body cartwheel. Never going to learn to do that without killing myself.
• Actually learned to salsa dance. Seriously fun. Anyone else ever tried this?



From left to right, my friend Jordan, Brittany (the one who tried to get herself run over) and, of course, me. We are in the theatre at the Denver Convention Centre getting ready to watch a play.

• Les Miserables is the best musical ever. Watched it for the first time. Oh. My. Gosh. It was beautiful.
• Didn't go to bed until 1 am. What was I saying about not needing sleep?
• Totally did not get up for a workout. Don't tell my dance teacher.
• Tried the same thing as yesterday, but with a Chipotle burrito. Bad life choice.
• Book shops are my best friend. Found a Mary Higgins Clark thriller for $4. Score!
• Does anyone here know what slam poetry is? (It's great.)
• Our bus was 45 minutes late picking us up. Yay.
• Ate Chick-fil-a for the first time ever. I love chicken.
• My mom became a secret agent.
• I just taught my sister how to mop the floor.

All in all, it was a fantastic weekend. How about everyone else? What kind of weird/interesting/super-exciting things have you done recently?

Sleep is Optional

No, this isn't actually my philosophy on life, and I don't recommend taking this approach. Any one of my friends could testify that I am always complaining about how inconvenient it is that human beings need sleep, but since we do, I try to get what I need. This, however, doesn't always happen. Let me outline my week for you:

SUNDAY: woke up at 7am, showered for church. Went to church. Came home. Finished a psychology project that wouldn't save right; didn't get in bed until midnight.
MONDAY: 5:15 I was up for daily devotions and left my house for school at 6:50. The school bell rings at 15:07. I cleaned up my seventh hour room (my seventh hour is a cadet block in which I have the opportunity to teach a sophmore English class). Found my dad, got food, went down for a dress rehearsal of our high school's fall musical, Annie. Left my school around 21:45, home by 22:30 (allowing for snow), homework, went to bed 23:30ish.
TUESDAY: same basic routine, except a little bit later getting home and getting into bed. By this point, I was thoroughly exhausted. This is roughly how the last three weeks of my life have been, which explains why it's been so long since I've blogged. Sorry.
WEDNESDAY: first performance! Up at five, left at 6:30. at the school, costumes, makeup, the whole shebang. Exhausting but enjoyable performance, cast pictures afterward. Around 14 I crashed in my drama teacher's room with Hairspray playing in the background. Speech and debate practice afterward, then--miracle of miracles--I went home! Ate dinner with my family, got in bed by 20, it was great.
THURSDAY: same morning routine as Monday and Tuesday. After school, I hung around with some friends, ate dinner, and headed down to drama at 17. Opening night was great, left the school at 22:23, in bed late.
FRIDAY: same as the day before but got home slightly earlier. Babysat my English teacher's overly energetic 5-year-old daughter after school, which was exhausting but amusing, as she "taught" my friend Alex to dance. Suffice it to say he'll never be a ballerina. :)
SATURDAY: today. Dragged myself up at 10:04 because my family was having breakfast. Currently, I'm sitting at my computer in my pyjamas writing a blog post and composing a cryptogram for my music theory class. My brother is home from college, my grandparents are here, we're officially on Thanksgiving break, and my sister Sage is cutting my youngest sister's hair. We have one more performance tonight and then I'll never sing "Tomorrow" again. :)

Needless to say, I've been busy. That's where the "sleep is optional" idea comes in. But there's another thing that has kind of become "optional" over the last few weeks: time with God.
Compare how much time you spend with God vs how much time you spend looking in the mirror. For me this usually isn't a problem, but that's because I don't spend any time looking in the mirror, not because I spend lots of time with God. When we get busy, it's super easy to consider that makeup and mirror time are mandatory, but time with God is the first to go. It's almost an automatic reaction.

I'm not going to challenge you to document your mirror time and your devotion time. But it's something to think about. Sometimes, it's okay to just drag a brush through your hair and leave it at that. Makeup is not a must. And unless you're planning on joining a musical, leave the drama to the professionals and try talking to God instead of the mirror.

~Sheridan

Outfit | Flashback Forties

Or, How I Finally Learned to be Smarter than the Camera.

That is, of course, me you see below. I've posted pictures of myself once before and will probably do so again. I dislike taking pictures of myself, nor do I particularly care for posting them online, but I'm learning to get over that by trying out unusual camera angles and trying to capture my own unique sense of style. Sometime, I'm going to need to share one of my super-snazzy scarf ensembles because I love my scarves. :)

The Outfit

I wore this outfit to church today and I enjoyed it immensely. I've actually had this skirt for a while but never worn it because I simply couldn't find a top that matched. I finally picked this white short-sleeve up at Goodwill a week or two ago. Pretty sure the skirt was a hand-me-down from a friend. Hat as well.

This is the "flashback forties" part. This style of outfit-skirt and looser shirt pulled in at the waist with a wide belt-is very forties. It's probably my favourite way to wear skirts; it's classy, stylish, and cute, but at the same time just unusual enough for people to notice. You'll see in all of my outfit posts (I'll try to put one up at least once a month just for fun) that my sense of style tends to be a little bit quirky.                                                                             You can almost see my necklace in this shot. It's a small gold cross-gift from a friend-worn to match small gold earrings. You can't see in these pictures, but I'm also wearing a brown corral anklet and simple black leather flip-flops.

I took all of these pictures on the deck outside of my house, so you can see the trees in the background. These two shots were actually taken in the same place, but I used different photo-editing techniques to improve the effects of the sunlight behind me (it was around 4:00 when I took them, and the sun was starting to set). I couldn't decide which one I liked better, so I put them both in. I like to call this my "contemplative" pose. Or I'm talking to myself. Whichever you prefer to believe. :)

The Camera

In my last post, I made the comment that I am "photo-clueless", and that's pretty much true. I can't work a camera to save my life. But I discovered something the other day when I was glaring at my camera and wondering why it wouldn't do what I wanted: I have a flash-timer.

I don't actually know if that's what you call it, but it's the fancy little timer thing that you set for ten seconds or whatever so you can run around, get in front of the camera, and pose. Super-cool, right? Yeah, so I have one of those, and I used it, and now I look extremely self-absorbed because I have two dozen pictures of myself on my camera. I then pulled my favourites into my computer to edit. I had planned to use Adobe Photoshop to edit my pictures, but my Windows 8 computer doesn't have it, so I pulled the pictures into PowerPoint and edited them that way. Seriously, you would be surprised what you can do with basic Microsoft tools. I didn't do anything major; just to alleviate some of the problems I was having with the light.

Here I am again. You see the lighting problems. For future reference, I don't do any editing with relation to how I actually appear in the pictures; just to make sure you can see me. I'm wearing very minimal make-up in this shot-mascara and a little bit of gold eyeshadow to emphasise the simple gold of the jewellery I was wearing. The way you see me is the way I am, and I will be totally honest and open about that fact.

This is a long post, and since I'm writing it with the Fellowship of the Ring Original Movie Soundtrack playing in the background, I'll leave you with this:

"I sang of leaves, of leaves of gold, and leaves of gold there grew:

Of wind I sang, a wind there came and in the branches blew.

Beyond the Sun, beyond the Moon, the foam was on the Sea,

And by the strand of Ilmarin there grew a Golden Tree."

-from Galadriel's song of Eldamar, The Fellowship of the Rings, JRR Tolkien

~Sheridan

Checking In

Hey, there!
So, I had really great plans to share one of my outfits with you this week because it was a great outfit and I was really excited about it, but two things happened.

1) I could NOT get a good picture of it! I tried everything I could think of, but it never came out looking right. If anyone who reads this knows anything about photography, leave me a tip because I am photo-clueless.

2) I discovered something very interesting. I was talking today with a friend who reads my blog, and she became very, very confused when I mentioned that I don't have Facebook. "But I see your posts on Facebook," she said. At which point, I became very, VERY confused because I don't have a Facebook and have never posted anything on there. Which means that someone is taking my posts and putting them up on Facebook.
If this is you, I would really appreciate it if you would tell me who you are and what you're doing with my posts. I didn't know this was happening and I would really like to know what is being done with my posts. Thank you.

For the rest of you: has anyone else been seeing my posts on Facebook? And again, that photography thing. Help!

Thanks, Siri; I Love You, Too

Me: Siri, do you love me?
Siri: you're looking for love in all the wrong places

No joke; this actually happened. It was possibly the most hysterical moment of my week, and I immediately decided to share it with you all. Aside from being funny, I think Siri actually has a very excellent point: we're looking for love in all the wrong places.

I don't like Siri. We are not now and never will be friends. But--for possibly the first and last time in my life--Siri said something that I agree with.

"Looking for love" is a phrase most of us have heard from one place or another, and it's very relevant and very true. We, as young women, often spend a lot of time looking for love.
The word "love" has always fascinated me. I speak a fair amount of French in addition to English, and I've always found this to be interesting: to say "I love this dress", I would say "j'aime cette robe", using the word "aimer" meaning "to like". To say "I love you", however, I would most likely use the word "adorer", meaning to love. Two different words in French, but the same English word covers it all.
In Greek, there are actually four different forms of the word "love": eros, storge, phileo, and agape. Each word means something different. I'm not going to go into all of that right now, but you can look it up if you want. But consider this: if they went through all the trouble to have four completely separate words, the concept of love must mean a lot to them. What does it then say about our culture that "I love you" and "I love pizza" both use the exact same word?
Looking for love is dangerous. I know, I've tried. All it does is turn your life into one gigantic mess, and I know that for a fact, but I continue to do it. Why?
Maybe because I'm human, or maybe because I'm just extraordinarily dumb; you can offer your opinion on that later. :) But I think the key may lie in this verse:

"Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field;

do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."

-Song of Solomon 2:7

You know the theory that sometimes it's better if you don't know what you're missing? Maybe whoever made that up was on to something. I never really went "looking for love" until that first encounter. Was it love? No. But the point stands that until that time, I was content, and now I sometimes find myself trying to attract attention because I'm no longer satisfied with where I am.

Don't get me wrong; I'm currently single and I have every intention of staying that way. My goal is to make it through all of high school without once being actually asked on a date. I like being single. But people--and especially, I think, women--are created with a unique need to feel loved. But if we go looking for it, we're not going to find "love". We're just going to end up getting hurt.

If you're my age and you're not "single", please don't feel like I'm trying to tell you that you're all wrong and you should dump him here and now. But I encourage everyone--myself included--to analyse our relationships and our behaviour, and see if we really are trusting God to bring the right person to the right place at the right time. It's hard. We all struggle. I've been told it's worth it; anyone feel like testing that with me?

What do you think? Do you find yourself "looking for love" sometimes? Do you think waiting is worth it? Why?

Sheridan

What We See (and What we Don't) Part Two

So, I noticed something when I got onto a different computer to check the comments yesterday: the image in my last post doesn't always show up. I don't know why that happens, but I now know that this was the case; sorry about that. I think it has something to do with the file format of the picture. I'll try to avoid that for future posts. :)
At any rate, I hope these pictures show up. 

This is the picture I posted earlier this week. One of my friends thought they looked like candles burning in the dark. I still think of falling stars. Would it surprise you to know that this picture

is the same as this picture

is the same as this picture?

 This is a screenshot of the weather forecast on my iPhone. I cropped out everything but the raindrops on the sides (which is the picture above) and--using only the photo-shopping options available on my phone--turned it into the first picture you saw. Pretty cool, huh?

Yes, I promise there is a point to this, other than showing off my super-iPhone photo-shopping skills. :) You see with these pictures how easy it is to make something look like something it's not. You don't need an iPhone to do it, either. We do this every day. Think about it: have you ever been lying in bed on a Sunday morning and really not wanted to go to church, but you made yourself get up just so you wouldn't look bad to the other people at church? I, as the eldest daughter of our youth pastor, feel this way all the time. No, I'm not actually "photo-shopping" anything, but it's the same concept: manipulating something to make it seem like something it isn't. I'm trying to make myself look like a "better Christian" even though my attitude is all wrong.
We do this with beauty, too. I have always had trouble shopping for clothes with my mom, because she'll tell me something looks great in the store, but then I wear it and I feel like she always tells me there's something wrong with it, but she waits until after I buy it. I'm sure some of you feel the same. Have you ever complained to your friends about how strict your parents are--about modesty, about dating, about anything? I know I have. Sometimes, I even complain about decisions that I agree with-the jeans are too tight, the shirt is too low, etc. This is also "photo-shopping".
Everyone photo-shops. Wearing make-up is photo-shopping. Inventing a boyfriend so we don't look so alone is photo-shopping. Gossip is photo-shopping. And the purpose of much of this is to make you, the average Christian girl, look and feel inferior. "I have a purity pledge" becomes "she just can't get a boyfriend". "I don't wear make-up" becomes "she's so sheltered she doesn't even know what make-up is". "I dress modestly" becomes "she doesn't know what's cool". Don't buy it.
Our biggest challenge with this is to look through the photo-shopping to what's really there. I see girls every day who walk around with a boyfriend on their arm, wearing immodest outfits and layers of make-up, and they treat me like I'm inferior, but when I look past all of that, I see girls who are insecure and scared because the world has told them that their worth comes from having a boyfriend and looking "sexy". They're photo-shopping their lives to make themselves look and feel better, and most of them don't even realise it.
As Christian girls, we need to fight against this trap. Christ is the freedom we all desperately need, and He will use us to bring it to everyone, including the people we go to school and work with every day. But first, we need to see--as they do--that photo-shopping is better left for the iPhone.

What We See (and What we Don't)

Can anyone tell me what this picture is? I know it's a little bit weird. To me, it looks a little like a meteor shower, but blurry. Falling lights of some kind. Post it in the comments; I'll pop back in Wednesday and see what you think. :)